Commencement Address

I can’t remember who delivered my commencement address. And over the years, I’ve listened to more graduation speeches than I care to remember…covering topics I can’t recall…delivered by notable public figures I cannot recollect.

But not today, and not for you.

I may not be a local dignitary, nor accomplished VIP. But I have something few other speakers of celebrity can claim. I know each and every one of you for the outstanding men and women you are…I know your beauty, your strengths, your kindness, and richness of heart…and yes, I even know your warts.

Your teachers and administrators wanted your graduation ceremony to be different…more memorable…more personal…and more reflective of the unusual journey we have all taken together. And so, my address to you this evening is unusual as well. It is part Hallmark card, part love letter, and part tribute to you, not only for what you can accomplish in the future, but because of what you already have accomplished here at Davidson Day.

For most of this class, your high school journey began in a tired, old factory building which made it difficult to see anything beyond the dingy corridors, worn-out rugs, and crumbling plaster. And truth be told, all of you were pretty rough around the edges as well. During my earliest days at Davidson Day that’s what I saw, too, when I entered the doors of the school each day. But all that changed very quickly. It wasn’t long before all I could see was a new vision filled with the potential for what Davidson Day could become and what you could become as well. And once I caught that vision, I could not rest. But, I had my work cut out for me. Because while you heard me speak about this vision and what could happen, you didn’t yet believe that it actually would happen.

And then it did. We were finally in our new home and it was exciting and new and beautiful…we even had windows in our classrooms. You thought you finally made it…that everything was going to be great…that now you were something. But once the awe and newness wore off, a new reality set in. There was still something missing…an elusive something that was needed to make it all seem special.

Then one day it happened. There was a determined knock on my office door and in burst your entire class demanding to meet with me. You wanted to discuss how your class could develop into the elder statesmen of the school and grow into the leaders you wanted to become.

This was the defining moment we had been waiting for. Because it was in this moment that everything changed. The house suddenly became a home, the school suddenly became YOUR school, and you were ready to embrace the leadership responsibility that was your right. Suddenly your legacy mattered to you.

And what a legacy it is. You have already accomplished more through your time at Davidson Day than most people will accomplish in their lifetime. You helped build a school that will shape and mold the lives of thousands of children for generations to come. How many men and women your age get to say that?

o You helped turn that tired, old factory building into a place of learning and fun, all the while keeping hope alive that we could deliver on the promise of a beautiful new building. Because of you, we did just that.

o You were willing to trust and share the best and worst of yourselves with us, and with each other. We talked a lot, sought each others counsel, and resolved issues both large and small. Because of you, we now have established a culture of respect and trust among students and adults in our community that will live on as your legacy. Without your honesty and openness, that would never have happened.

o Your eagerness to take that first AP course, form that new club, and try that second sport, made it possible for us to put in place the programs that are already beginning to flourish and attract new students. That wouldn’t have happened without you, either.

It is one thing to be first, as in a race or competition. Such accomplishment is joyous, but fleeting in significance. It is quite another to be the first, as in the strongest, largest, brick in a foundation upon which a magnificent structure will be built. The brick itself may not be glamorous and conspicuous in its glory. But without it, no structure could be built nor sustained.

You are the brick, the rock, the foundation upon which Davidson Day has been founded and upon which its future is being built. You are forever our first.

And here you are now. Sitting before me as our first graduates and soon to be first alumni. When you walk from this room and begin a whole new adventure, you won’t have Ms. Hallman’s daily words of wisdom or compassionate ear to help you end your day. You won’t have your teachers reminding you of a missed assignment or Ms. Rand tracking you down. But you don’t need that anymore. You’re ready to move on. You now must reach into yourselves to find your own way, knowing that the experience and wisdom you have acquired from your teachers, friends, and parents these past 18 years have prepared you well.

Above all, remember the lesson you learned as we moved from our old building into our new one. It is not circumstance that defines you. Rather it is what you choose to do with those circumstances that will tell the story of your life. Make great choices. Make each day count, and make humility and gratitude part of your life.

Find potential where others can’t see it; and then commit yourself to making it happen. Think big and inspire others. Davidson Day wouldn’t be here today without people with big ideas and big hearts.
Don’t believe it when people say you can’t achieve something; you know better than that. They said we couldn’t build our school, they said that it would never happen. We proved them all wrong. In your life, you can prove the naysayers wrong, too.
Channel your anger and frustration into action to change things for the better. Don’t let your emotions defeat you. Anger and frustration are the foundation for passion. They are the source of unbounded energy and motivation to do great things. Do great things with your passion.
Let your compassion and kindness make a difference and enrich this world. You don’t have to search for that great big cause. Your kindness to one person at a time is all it takes. Don’t underestimate what it means to be needed by even one person. If you think that doesn’t matter, just remember your classmates’ speeches last night. What has made the greatest difference to each of them has been the love of your friendship. Be a good friend.
Don’t ever doubt that you can make a difference. Look at what you’ve already done. You’ve already built a school. You can do anything.
Don’t take the easy way out; the tough way is usually more rewarding. It wasn’t always easy being the first class at a young and growing school. But you stuck it out and built something special the hard way. And from your comments last night, you know you wouldn’t trade that experience for anything. Remember this lesson when you are tempted to sell yourself short or coast along.
Don’t fear being different or avoid risks. Everyone else isn’t always right. Trust your instincts. The greatest innovators and leaders didn’t follow the pack. You don’t need to either.
Don’t wait for others to make you happy. Happiness rests solely in your hands. It comes from within and from the choices you make. Stay in touch with your true self and pursue with a passion all that makes you happy. Find a path in life that makes you want to get up in the morning.

On a personal note, I want you to know that you have been the driving force behind my joy to get up every morning and work hard to build this school. You have given my life and my work special meaning.

o It was your eyes, your face, and your heart I searched to find guidance, to help me do the right thing and to focus on the most important things when I was faced with difficult choices.

o It was my greatest hope to make you proud of Davidson Day School and your place as its first graduating class; this alone gave me the courage to take risks and turn doubters into believers.

o It was your standards and expectations I wanted to measure up to; it was your potential I wanted to unlock. I couldn’t bear to let you down.

It is because of you that I am the person I am today. Our school would not be what it is if it weren’t for you. And you would not be who you are without this school.

Our lives are forever entwined. Just as our school has turned from a rough piece of coal into the shining diamond it is today, your experience at Davidson Day has smoothed away your rough edges and nurtured the inquisitive, confident, capable, loving men and women that stand before us today.

Now as we turn you loose with mixed emotions of joy and sadness, we are confident that you are well-prepared to take your dreams to new heights. Your unique gifts will make the world a much more interesting and lively place. I know you will enrich others as you have enriched me and our school.

There is so much beauty and goodness in you. I would not change a single thing about you.

I am proud to claim you as our first graduating class. I am proud to have had the pleasure of being your Headmaster.

20 years from now, you probably won’t remember who delivered your commencement address. And you probably won’t remember anything I’ve said this evening. But one thing you need to remember from this day. I am speaking on behalf of all of the people whose lives you’ve touched here at Davidson Day School—know you are loved, that you made a difference, and that we will always be here for you. Congratulations class of 2009!

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